What one ability distinguished Boston Tom McMustache...

which Tom McMustache was it who opened a tin of kippers using only the lethal apex points of his famous handle bar trade mark? was it German/Albanian Tom or Scotch/Zulu Tom? Or was it the legend Bostonian himself?

 

The ability to hold in a poo. This forgotten trait of the Bronze age era of boxing was the downfall of many modern greats(Duran, Roberto etc..)

 

:l haha!

 

Boston Tom was known to go weeks without defecating while in training, loudly proclaiming that it helped to "foster a suitably rancorous demeanor for fisticuffs". It's widely believed that he refrained from shitting for some two months prior to facing Arizona Pierre Bucholski, who had insulted him by claiming his mustache was held in place by staples.

This was part and parcel with one of his other traditions, the post-fight victory dump. These could last for hours and were often regarded as more of a show than the fights themselves. Reports that seven bystanders were killed during a disastrous victory dump in Reno, Nevada after a McMustache 457th round KO of Billy McTyphoid are considered unreliable.

 

:rofl:rofl:rofl

 

I hear they named a major U.S city after him.

 

it was said Toms mother refused to shave her back until her son retired from pugilism..

 

In the twilight of his career, Boston, by then visually impaired from drinking a batch of methanol, found himself being shellacked for 23 rounds straight against Hymen "The Swingin' Pollack" Shmeckel. Bloodied, frustrated, and nearly blind, Boston would turn his attack to referee Millard Colfax, knocking him cold with a single, well-placed elbow after groping the ref's shoulder to orient himself. Shmeckel, not one for formalities, would continue to savagely pound Boston.

With luck, Leapin' Len McMustache, Boston's brother, would come to the rescue, snatching the bell from ringside and blindsiding Shmeckel with it, rendering him unconscious. Tom, quick to seize the moment, awakened Colfax, who, upon seeing the unconscious Easter European, awarded Tom with a victory via knockout.

The ensuing riot caused largely by intoxicated Polish immigrants in attendance would cause all known formal documentation of the fight to be destroyed. Colfax, soon made aware of a rumored whiskey soaked romp betwixt Boston, Lenny, and Colfax's ex-wife, refused to testify on his ruling of the fight, in turn causing Boston to mark his 137th no contest.

 

Still practiced among Irish travellers today, I believe. Hence the reason Tyson Fury's so full of ****.

 

Clap clap clap

 

:rofl

 

Aye, Tomsburg Tennessee. Home of the only all state tache growing competition for the under fives. A fine town for watching bare knuckle fisticuffs in random strangers' basements while swigging homemade moonshine and slapping your thighs.

 

Can anyone find the report for this fight. I'm still searching...

 

Suckers like you, looking on Boxrec and Google... McMustache was ahead of his time and made sure these 'tools' would not violate his legacy.