The Paper Champion's guide to avoidong unification

I found this on another site and thought it was interesting;

1. Find the weakest titleholder to beat in the current division.
2. On the very next day after the win make a press release claiming you wish to unify the belts against any of the other champions, without providing any concrete details whatsoever. (Don’t ever name names because that will make people think those guys are better then you and can therefore ask for more money in negotiations.)
3. After your first voluntary defense, against a complete journeyman at best, avoid any questions regarding unification during post-fight interviews, with winning responses like “Anyone who wishes to step up to the plate,” or “Whoever the public wants me to fight.” In the worst case you can also mention how, “I would love to do it but it depends on my manager and promoter.”
4. Stall for time, or ask for too much money when, or on the off chance another paper champ offers to fight you. Mandatory excuse upcoming.
5. Fight your mandatory. Most likely a hand picked opponent not much different from your first voluntary defense.
6. Repeat steps 2-4 to stall for more time.
7. Make up a bunch of reasons for why it is your promoter’s fault and how you are still the best in the division and would fight anybody.
8. Claim you have beaten anybody put in front of you and therefore deserve to be recognized as the one true champ.
9. If are actually using reason 7 for a prolonged period of time, claim how you are the longest reigning champion who has held a belt.
10. Repeat steps 2-9 as necessary until you get KO’ed badly by a real fighter.
11. Make sure to inadvertently get on your conqueror’s bandwagon and make him out to be goliath and thereby you the second best in the division.
12. If you wait long enough you can go back to step 1, and repeat the cycle all over again.