Deontay it's Shelley, Please pick up the phone, I wanted to tell you, All about DAZN, Sure they're offering you money, But it simply won't do, We don't want you signing, With somebody new, For we take certain measures, As we know you can't box, So we fix all the scorecards, Hence you're staying with Fox, Still look on the bright side, 2 million we feel, Is a wonderful payday, For a fight with Breazeale, Once myself Al and Jay, Have taken our slice, You've enough for a burger, And fries - ain't that nice,
As you know, I signed a contract with Eastsideboxing to provide this forum with a touch of class after they expressed disappointment with the lack of moral fibre of some of the more prolific contributors. So I've been unable to accept the massive offers from the US networks desperate to secure the rights to these mighty odes. A mere $50k per week however was never going to cut it long term. Pretty soon I'll be looking to renegotiate. I've asked my representative, Shelley Finkel, to handle the negotiations. He's assured me that his strategy of refusing to take calls and pretending not to be in the office is the way forward to riches.
I save these posts to enjoy by the fireside whilst drinking claret from a human skull. Brilliant work, sir.
Not strictly from the notebook of Deontay, he's not sent me his latest yet: Oh Wilder you loon, Don't blame your costume, Cherry picking Fury, Was the cause of your doom, The Gypsy ragdolled you, Set a FURYious pace Just accept your defeat, With a little good grace, So pack up your notebook, Don't be causing a fuss, Throwing Breland your trainer, Under a bus,
When I was walking up the stair, I met a man that wasn't there, He wasn't there again today, I think his name is Deontay, I swore his presence could be felt, I thought I saw him with a belt, Was that not the face we love, Connected to Fury's right glove? Or would it simply be unfair, To suggest that he was really there, In Vegas on that special night, When Fury knocked from him the shite, (with apologies William Hughes Mearns)
