Prime Foreman, Mike Tyson, Vitali, Fury, and Primo Carnera vs a male Silverback Gorilla

This thread reminds me of how, way back when, I made a bunch of super-specific versus threads about Foreman at various stages of his career, and someone responded with "Old Foreman vs Foreman With A Parrot On His Shoulder." A great thread, that.

plus ça change...

 

Also, the gorilla would almost certainly win, unless the humans are armed. In which case the odds shift markedly in their favor, even if we also give the gorilla weapons.

 

Yeah your right I was tripping.

 

“One of the only recorded instances of a Gorilla killing a human is by a Silverback picking up a grown man with one armand ripping his head off with the other.”

 

The gorilla would be lined at -100000000 to win. You have to bet 1 million dollars to win a dollar.

 

I want Mike Tyson in there too.

 

Are we talking peak gorilla here, or over the hi washed up gorilla

 

The typical Eastern Lowland Gorilla has an overall height of 44.0”-52.0” (112-132 cm) and withers height of 63.0”-72.0” (160-183 cm). An average Eastern Lowland Gorilla weighs between 220-460 lb (100-210 kg) and has a typical lifespan of 30-40 (wild), 40-60 (captivity).

 

Googled that of course. I'm no expert but I think I fancy the gorilla at this stage.

 

Even so, I think the gorilla wins, it's just too ****ing strong

 

A chimpanzee, a m-onkey, would rip their faces off.

 

If they have time to coordinate beforehand, get some nasty knuckle dusters, are full on adrenaline and willing to go with the idea to the death i.e no panic midway, then they might chase it away. Whether somebody dies depends on how angry the gorilla is at the beginning. Realistically a gorilla wouldn't attempt to all out attack five man, four of which are this heavy and large. Gorilla ain't honey badger. They are rather timid.

A heavyweight boxer, especially the heavy handed ones like Tyson and Foreman, would deal an insane amount of damage if hitting barehanded or with additional brass knuckle. If the gorilla attacks (best case scenario it goes for Primo, Fury, or Klitschko), then it's likely getting hit in the occiput or another vulnerable part of the head. Even multiple body shots by four remaining fighters might be sufficient to scare it off.

Still, a messy affair. Don't give Don King any ideas.

 

Da Preem’s involved. I’m guessing the fix is in. Gorilla’s been paid a life time’s supply of bananas to take a dive. Smart money is on the who-mans.