***The Official Deontay "Beyonce"/"Burgersquad" Wilder Super-Size Critics Thread***

There are too many Wilder critics threads made. Let your Wilder critics talk here.

 

--Knocked out badly by an unknown LHW in amatuers
--Outboxed badly by a Polish Sausage in the amatuers
--Squeaked by with a bronze medal somehow in the Olympics
--Put down by morbidly obese Dustin "Big Worm" Nichols with a "Check-Jab"
--Put down heavily and almost out by professional loser Harold "Hard Roc" Sconiers
--Built much of his career by beating sad corpses like Harrison and Lyakhovich
--Brought in personal friend Malik Scott to take an obvious dive
--Did not fight the real champ for his "title" but a Don King manufactured Buffet champion
--Knocked down by 2 Wlad jabs and OUT with one medium left hook in sparring
--Destroyed and almost ktfo'd by Haye in sparring
--Rocked heavily by a Firtha jab
--Could not defeat a very ill Stiverne as convincingly as Demetrice King
--Could not even knock a very ill Stiverne down like Rossy
--Some of the most shameful opponents for his "title defenses" that the world has ever seen, showing his low self esteem
--Rocked badly and almost Knocked out vs substitute teacher Molina ("Drummer Boy")
--He did not perform as well against Molina as Arreola OR Ashanti Jordan, both of whom knocked him out in 1
--Eye busted up and made to look like a gargoyle by Duhaupas ("The Reptile"), a French pastry chef
--Sold as a nice guy, but actually spends his time beating up hookers and mental patient Charlie Zelenoff, who are ironically his best opponents
--Dispresects great fighters like Tyson and Klitschko
--Now trying to claim that Fury's "courageous" win somehow makes him champion.
--Avoiding Povetkin like the plague
--Seems to be using a new tactic,probably to mask steroid use, of not allowing his pathetic opponents a full camp
--Was considering Wawryck, knocked out in 3 by his mandatory, as an opponent
--Offered a shot to Adamek, a shot to pieces 39 year old former LHW who is 1-2 in his last three, but only allowed him a 6 week camp.
--Avoided Briggs and Bronco Billy Wright, shot fighters who carry AARP cards
--Will fight an unemployed Soccer Hooligan named Szpilka? on 4 weeks notice, and will underpay him, overfeed and hooker him up
--Wilder's team, the "Burger Squad", keeps removing and scrubbing the Internet of all of his shameful knockdowns and ktfo's; mostly while attempting a bad attempt at the "Ali Shuffle", which will now be called the "Burger Bungle".
--Got punked out badly by unemployed, fur coat wearing soccer hooligan Spzilka at face off for their upcoming "title" fight
-- Was being outclassed by undersized, unemployed, glorified bum, fur coat wearing, soccer hooligan Spzilka for 9 rounds
-- Was clearly intimidated by Tyson Fury after landing a lucky punch against undersized, unemployed, glorified bum, fur coat wearing, soccer hooligan Spzilka
-- When intimidated by Fury, had to resort to his pathetic catchphrase, causing embarrassment to, and for, everyone associated with the Wilder camp.
--Now is again avoiding Povetkin like the plague and will likely be stripped of his title; but Uncle Al will give him a
worthless, manufactured PBC belt.
--Tried to fight the CAN Martin in a title unification match, but the WBC refused to allow the fight, and that Wilder fight his mandatory; then team Bronze Burger attempted to get Povetkin to fight Martin, but he refused; just another pitiful attempt to duck Povetkin.
--Wilder skips leg day, resulting in pitiful 14" calves on a 6'7 man, which produce thefunniest chicken dances and future ktfo's ever.
--Ducked and ran from his mandatory Povetkin,again, and will now face the washed up burrito-boy Arreola, who was smashed by shot Vitali,lost clearly to a shop-worn light-heavyweight, Adamek, got ktfo'd by can Stiverne (who was outclassed easily by Wilder somehow), went life and death with sub-journeyman Kaufmann, who also ironically failed a drug test.
--Will probably be made to do a dance by the aforementioned,washed up,burrito and Corona boy Arreola, and very well might get ktfo'd too.
--Ducked fight with a clean Povetkin, ran back to Alabama, and still demanded $5million dollars, now will fight someone who trains on burritos and coronas
--Ran from aforementioned Burrito-Corona-Boy and took him 8 rounds and still couldn't beat him as convincingly as Buffet king Stiverne
--Tried so futile hard to KO Arreola with hisoverrated power shots, he broke his puny wrist and biceps and still couldn't put the shot Californian out. There was a mercy stoppage
--Now is ducking everyone for the rest of the year due to his "courageous" injuries, including his 2 year mandatory Povetkin and states he will fight Joshua, as a cash out but everyoneknows he will chicken out.
--Miraculously was healed from his injuries only AFTER his mandatory, Povetkin, announced he would fight buffet King Stiverne.
--Now is cleared to come back in the Spring, but will likely choose another scrub like Wawryck or Bronco Billy as defense and call it a necessary "tune up".
-- WBC grants Wilder an unprecedented 5TH voluntary defense, and announces he will likely fight the total can Wawryck in the Spring who was spanked in 3 by his mandatory.
--Now his mandatory Povetkin, destroyed in Tyson-esque style, the French pastry chef Duhaupas, the guy who busted up Wilder and took all his "power" shots no problem, in fewer rounds than Wilder.
--In fact WILL fight the Polish sausage, and complete can with NO chin, none, Wawryck, will probably be made to do a Disney on Ice dance, en route to a lucky punch TKO of his much heralded "5th title defense", further displaying his and his team's lack of confidence in him and his shaky whiskers.
--Wawrzyk fight off, Team Wilder currently searching the Buffet and Steak Houses of Alabama for his next opponent.
--Wilders team is now so pathetic that they are constantly setting up fights against PED cheaters. Obviously the fights will get cancelled so that fragile mandible stays untouchable.
--Wears a mask to the ring before every fight in a vain effort to try to hold his chin together.

Credit to Benitom3 and catchwtboxing for this dossier.