Tyson Fury vs. Antonio Tarver - Milkdud officially throws down gauntlet

At least on social media.

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Must confess if this comes off it will be fascinating to watch play out (even though I also believe the sport will continue to do just fine without them if both stay retired, because: old and because: obese, respectively) just in terms of their juxtaposed sizes and styles.

I'd actually prefer Tarver over Briggs (as this match-up seems more of an enigma with multiple possibilities, whereas Fury vs. Briggs is 99% certain to be just Tyson dancing figure-eights around the wheezing asthmatic Shannon, jabbing his face off, with a slim lucky-hail-Mary puncher's chance for the Cannon)

 

I think it would be a very ugly, very ponderous, very low-output affair. Both will be cautious, and incapable of any bursts of speed or explosiveness (Tarver because hes ancient; Fury because he's enormous).

Tarver has always been cautious, an intelligent, foxy boxer/puncher and counter-puncher by trade, and he will fully well realize Fury is double his size. He won't be looking to unnecessarily take any foolish shots from a superheavy that dwarfs him, ergo he will pot shot with counters and not take many risks, hoping for the best on the cards. He will realize he doesn't have the power to knock the giant out.

Fury however might not realize that. He will be wary from his last encounter with an underestimated small old counter-puncher (Cunningham hurt him bad) and as a student of the game will be aware that Tarver has sneaky pop if he lands right (any excuses tonight Roy?). He won't just blindly bum-rush (the only point doing so would be to maul Tarver hoping for a KO but he honestly has even less of a prayer of kayoing Mildud than vice-versa; Tarver's chin is IRON, 100x better than Cubbingham's, plus he's defensively extremely skilled and full of savvy veteran tricks). He'll be respectful to a fault and maybe even dance around the same way he did with Klitschko, as absurd a sight as it would be for a man of his stature and girth to box daintily and carefully on his toes against a comparatively tiny, not very mobile, geriatric.

I could see every round being a repeat of the last..turns being taken and pot shots exchanged from both (Fury circling, Tarver cemented to one spot and pivoting to square up), with frequent clinches leading to foul-fests (rabbit punches by Fury; low blows from Tarver; elbows and thumbs from both) that ends in a controversial split or majority type decision, with zero satisfied customers and everybody wishing they hadn't watched it.

 

I would actually have a heart attack from laughing so hard.

Seriously, probably would, I have family history.